A pirate was talking to a "land-lubber" in a bar   
        The Pirate

A pirate was talking to a "land-lubber" in a bar. 
The land-lubber noticed that, like any 
self-respecting pirate, this guy had a peg leg,
a hook in place of one of his hands and a patch over one eye. The land-
lubber just had to find out how the pirate got in such bad shape. He 
asks the pirate, "How did you loose your leg?" The pirate responds, 
"I lost me leg in a battle off the coast of Jamaica!"

His new acquaintance was still curious so he asked,
"What about your hand. Did you loose  it at the same time?" 
"No," answered the pirate. 
"I lost it to the sharks off the Florida Keys."

Finally, the land-lubber asked, "I noticed you also have an eye patch. 
How did you loose your eye?" The pirate answered, "I was sleeping on a
beach when a seagull flew over and crapped right in me eye." 
The land-lubber asked, "How  could a little seagull crap make you loose your
eye?" The pirate snapped, It was the day after I got me hook!"


 
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