There was an Irishman, an Englishman and Claudia Schiffer sitting on a train   
                On a train

 There was an Irishman, an Englishman and Claudia Schiffer sitting
 together in a carriage in a train going through Tasmania.
 
 Suddenly the train went through a tunnel and as it was an old style
 train, there were no lights in the carriages and it went completely
 dark. Then there was this kissing noise and the sound of a really
 loud slap.   When the train came out of the tunnel, Claudia Schiffer
 and the Irishman  were sitting as if nothing had happened and the
 Englishman had his hand against his face as he had been slapped
 there.
 
 The Englishman was thinking: 'The Irish fella must have kissed
 Claudia Schiffer and she missed him and slapped me instead.'
 
 Claudia Schiffer was thinking: 'The English fella must have tried to
 kiss me and actually kissed the Irishman and got slapped for it.'
 
 And the Irishman was thinking: 'This is great. The next time the
 train goes through a tunnel I'll make another kissing noise and slap
 that English bastard again.


 
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