Three Men at Heaven's Gate
There were three gentlemen waiting at the pearly gates. St. Peter comes out
and says, "I've got some disappointing news for two of you. We are having some
problems in our admissions area. I can only let one of you come into heaven
today. I can get the other two tomorrow, but only one today."
St. Peter continued to explain, "The person who can tell the best story how
they died will be the one who comes in to heaven today." The gentlemen thought
this was fair.
The first man stood up to St. Peter and began: "I knew my wife was cheating on
me, I rushed home from work, flew open the door and there she was, lying on the
couch, naked. I knew I caught her! I ran all through the apartment. Upstairs,
downstairs, under the bed, in the closets, NOTHING! I was just about to
apologize to her when I heard a SCRATCH, SCRATCH, SCRATCH at the window. I
opened the window and there he was, hanging from the windowsill. I grabbed a
skillet and banged him on the head. I watched him fall down down down, but he
landed in some bushes. I was still flaming with adrenaline! I edged our
refrigerator over to the window and it was just about to fall when I noticed my
coat was hooked to the frige. So down I fall to my death."
St. Peter couldn't help but be shocked! He said, "That was a great story! You
are sure to be the winner today."
The next man steps up and says, "Well, I was a window washerman. I was doing my
job one afternoon when all of a sudden the ropes broke and I'm falling to my
death. I had my arms raised up to God praying to catch me. At one moment my
hands caught a window ledge, I was SAVED!! I was giving my thanks and trying to
get the people inside to open the window by scratching at the window when all of
a sudden a crazy man opened the window and beaned me with a skillet. Once again
I was falling to my death. But once again, I was being watched. I fell into a
nice group of bushes. As I opened my eyes to thank God, a refrigerator was
screaming down at me. That is my story."
St. Peter was stunned. He looked at the last man and said, "You better have a
good story, because the last man had a doozy!"
The last man smiled and said, "OK, picture this, Naked, hiding in a
refrigerator...."
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